Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Buttercream mosquitos

How can someone so small be so annoying? Seriously, this woman I work with is about 4'10'' and is as annoying as a six foot tall mosquito. Really, it's amazing - she walks into the room and the air becomes tannic... and not in an intimidating sort of way... she doesn't have any real control over my job and I don't feel threatened by her in any way... I almost look forward to seeing her because I have this overwhelming urge to argue. I crave confrontation with her so much I feel like crouching in a dark corner outside of her office, biding my time, waiting as patiently as a trapdoor spider or a cakeless fat guy the day before his coworker Margie's 38th birthday party when he knows that Frank is picking up the cake at Clawson's Bakery and everyone knows that Clawson's is the best because they have those little blue icing flowers like every other bakery but they make theirs from real buttercream and god knows real buttercream goes down like mother's milk especially when you volunteer to clean up after and can sit in the break room, just you and the cake's cardboard underbelly with all of the little buttercream flower scraps clinging seductively to it's edge.
What was I - ah yes, annoying. The point being, she is annoying.
Dammit. I lost my story. Just keep thinking about cake.

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